"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk to blossom."- Anis Nin

About Awakening: How a 53 year old wife and mother "became" a lesbian
Awakening is a story about second chances and overcoming obstacles, as told by a woman who, after coming out as a lesbian in middle age, embarked upon a new chapter in her life.

Pat Stone was fifty-three when she told her husband that, after thirty-five years of marriage, she was a lesbian. Homosexuality was not a taboo topic in their home: their daughter had come out seven years earlier, spurring her mother to become a gay-rights activist. Stone marched in parades, spoke in public forums, and counseled countless fellow parents struggling to deal with their children's homosexuality. As a founder of the Dallas chapter of Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG), she was repeatedly recognized with awards for her work in the gay community.

Yet none of this work prepared Stone, her family, or her friends for her own shattering sexual revelation. It not only upended her marriage, it called into question her very sense of self. Slowly, however, she came to realize that she had been given a second chance at happiness, a chance to be wholly true to herself. Her account of her awakening goes beyond sexuality, encompassing common issues such as the ups and downs inherent in gay and straight relationships, the grief of losing a parent to Alzheimer's; and a woman's struggles with self-image. In her thoughtful memoir, Pat Stone gracefully illuminates the possibilities at the heart of a life-changing experience.

Click here to read excerpts from Awakening and here to read the press release.

Order Awakening here!

About the Author
Pat Stone grew up in Wichita Falls, Texas, and attended the University of Texas. She is a founder and past president of the Dallas chapter of Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG). She has received numerous awards for her advocacy work in the gay community, including The Extra Mile Award and The Dallas Gay and Lesbian Alliance Board of Director's Award. A proud mother of two, she and her partner Evie have been together for eleven years. Today, she lives in a lake community outside of Dallas.

You can send an e-mail to the author at PFLAGPAT@aol.com.

Excerpts

It was Tuesday, October 29, 1996, the day I planned to tell my husband. I sat in the den of my comfortable home in Dallas, Texas, about to cause a major change in my family and in my life. How could this have happened? […] Was I about to lose a good friend? No, I was sure he would understand and be supportive […] I felt certain that with time, he and I would continue our friendship, go to movies, have dinner, and share holidays and other occasions with our children. He would understand that none of this was his fault. Was I being naive? […] Would he be shocked? I didn't want to hurt him […] Surely he would admire me for being honest with him, and especially for never having cheated on him. Man, I had not even acted on this new discovery, not a kiss, not a date - nothing.

I didn't know if I had a type; everything was very new to me. I did know that even many straight people preferred certain types or specific characteristics in their partners. I remembered Lory describing herself as a "butch in drag" when she spoke at PFLAG in July. I suppose that meant that she had the attitude of a butch, but dressed as femme - a very confusing message for some of us. I hoped there would be someone out there who would see me as their type, as well as like me for my inner worth. I was too old to change. I was going to continue to wear lipstick, polish my nails, and carry a purse!

This was nothing compared to the trip to the tattoo parlor in Dallas. I decided I wanted a butterfly tattoo on the left side of my upper chest! So Jenny and Shannon went with me and stayed outside the room, peeking through the glass. I had to be brave since they were watching me […] I thought a red butterfly would be nice - signifying my coming out of my cocoon and flying free.

When Lory came to the door, she introduced me to someone she had brought with her. She said, “This is Evie." I tried to shake her hand, but I was holding something so I said that I would just give her a hug. She replied, "I'll take anything I can get" […] After seeing Evie, I knew why I had not been Lory's type. She was wearing snug jeans, boots, a shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and she had her salt and pepper hair cut short due to her work in landscaping.

One of the saddest moments for me personally occurred a few months after we realized Mother had Alzheimer's. She had actually ordered a lovely pink porcelain music box (shaped like a round gift box) for me through the mail; she had written the check for it herself. When she gave it to me, she was afraid it was not nice enough, that the music didn't sound just right. I was so proud of it then, and now I treasure it even more. The title on the bottom says, "Always My Daughter," and it says it's a premier issue in A Mother's Love. When I wind it up, it plays "Always." The music sounds great, but I can barely listen to it without crying.

As I stood there in that cafeteria, I knew that there was only one more answer for me - gastric bypass surgery. At that time I weighed around 220 pounds, barely enough to qualify for the surgery […] I knew I could die from the surgery; however, I also knew that it was likely that I would die an early death anyway due to being so overweight. The 220 pounds would soon expand to 230, then 250. Soon I would be back up to my all time high of 265. I seemed helpless to stop it.


Press Release

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

New memoir tells how wife and mother discovers second chance at life

In Awakening, a story of discovery, Pat Stone reveals how she finally finds herself
when she falls in love with another woman

DALLAS, Texas – Awakening: How a 53-Year-Old Wife and Mother Became a Lesbian is Pat Stone’s story of how she found the courage and integrity to face overwhelming obstacles to come out of the closet.

In her memoir, Stone takes readers on her personal journey discovering her true orientation and a new way of life. From her childhood, where she begins to feel she is “different,” to the end of her 35-year marriage, Stone candidly discusses how her struggle leads her to venture into the gay and lesbian community. The founder of Late Bloomers, an organization for midlife women who discover they are lesbians, Stone discusses the issues of coming out. She also details her life with her partner, Evie, and how, like any relationship, it has its ups and downs.

Stone aims to show readers that gays and lesbians face the same issues as straight people. She describes grappling with her mother’s Alzheimer’s, as well as her own financial problems and weight issues. After finding her activist voice and true love, Stone now seeks to impart a message of bravery, honesty and humor to anyone contemplating a major change.

For more information or to request a free review copy, members of the press can contact the author at PFLAGPAT@aol.com. Awakening is available for sale online at Amazon.com, BookSurge.com, and through additional wholesale and retail channels worldwide.